missing….


this photo was taken last september in chicago…….audra, margo and i were all together and went walking along lake michigan just after a big storm. it was beautiful, we took tons of photos and they make me happy whenever i look at them….(for this one, we setup the auto timer and then jumped in the air – – we were cracking up – – it was hilarious)

i have been very sick for the past two days. actually, this is the sickest i can ever in my entire life remember being. and i feel far from home.

i think when people are sick, they really go back to the basics – – besides feeling horrible, it wrecks havoc on your senses and your emotions. we all search, and need, that comfort feeling of home and warm and safe.

i’m not sure how long it takes in a new place for that to become ‘home’ – – but i’m not there yet. do you think it’s a frame of mind? an event that causes the flip in thinking? the people you are surrounded by? a steady job?

i am not sure……

but just for today, i’m taking a pause….thinking about things, and wishing i could transport myself – – even if for one day – – to the place i call home.

i don’t know how lots of things work here – – i don’t know how to say things politely in french, or at least i feel like i am going to sound rude, and fear offending people constantly. everything is so different and i never know what to do or what to say. and it makes me uncomfortable. on a daily basis.

but, to reassure myself, this is quite normal. i’m not sure there is a person on earth who wouldn’t have these feelings once in a while if living in a far away place……..

so tomorrow is another day, a new beginning and don’t worry – i’ll keep moving forward…..

everything will be okay ;-)

(and i promise i’ll write lots of fun and happy stuff in a few days……)

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7 thoughts on “missing….

  1. JesAnn

    feel better!
    keep your chin up….i admire your courage and envy your adventurous life right now!
    ….but selfishly I miss having you here!

    Reply
  2. corey d

    thanks jes – – i miss you too!! i always feel better getting things off my chest ;-) hope all is well in chi-town…!! xox

    Reply
  3. marsha

    i too, love that picture of you girls. :-) it makes me smile…
    it’s hard to move some where strange….and to be sick on top of that! :-(
    wishing i were there, giving you a warm cup of tea, and one big hug!

    Reply
  4. Margo

    You don’t have to feel hunky dory all at once or all in one day, it will take a while and you can take as long as you like to get to there! We all love you whatever you say or do or wherever you live! :)

    Reply
  5. Anonymous

    Oh Corey!! Everything worth doing is hard…and if you weren’t homesick or sad sometimes, we’d think you were delusional!!!! Always here for you, keeping my fingers crossed for the best, and hoping that you’re open to the full range of experiences that France has to offer. Cheers to you for being so brave!!! -Carla and Aaron

    Reply

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